David Wong, 6 Harsh Truths That Will Make You a Better Person (via creatingaquietmind)
I definitely agree with this.
Though I tend to be in perhaps the opposite position.
Often times girls have referred to me as the ‘nice guy’ and I tend to get offended by it because it just makes me feel like I am nice to ‘gain’ a girl’s sexual interest when really I just am nice to everybody by default.
I remember going out with some co-workers to the bar and they brought some girls with them. Now these are the type of people where if I was in high school I probably would have been nowhere near them but being a bit older and working with them it made the situation slightly different. After we were drunk and waiting for a cab I bought a shit ton of pizza for everyone because well I am hammered and hungry and don’t want to be that asshole who eats in front of everyone and really, typically I am that one who just does that sort of thing. One of the girls who was there seemed so taken back by it and kept going on and on about how that was the nicest thing anyone has ever done and she couldn’t believe I was letting her have some. I found that to be the most retarded thing ever. It then made me question who the hell she hangs out with and in all seriousness there was no creepy motive behind it. I didn’t want any of those girls and didn’t have any sexual intention whatsoever. I bought it for everyone, including the guys. But her going on about it made me really hope she wasn’t taking it the wrong way and thinking I was trying to be that ‘nice guy’ to her.
I also find that because of my nerd style and personality, girls who tend to care the most about their outer physique act like any attention they give me (especially straight-identified women) should make me worship them and think they are Gods because someone like them is talking to someone like me. When really, sure you have tits, ass, and are slim, I just don’t give a fuck. Those types of girls are everywhere and they all look the same to me. It’s only when I get to know a person for who they are alongside to what they look like is when they start to appear distinctive to everyone else.
I guess just basically I know I am much more than just a ‘nice person’. I also can use the same situation to describe how I feel about being transgender. It is at the bottom of the list of what I would describe myself as. I don’t use either as a selling point. (I say selling point not to mean to attract women but to discuss myself to any person) We all have things about us that stand out and that really isn’t one of the things I want to be what comes first in someone’s mind when they think of me.
Don’t get me wrong though, there is nothing wrong with being nice. but there is something definitely wrong with being nice to override an asshole and try to ‘get something or someone out of it’.
(Source: violetmaps, via onjailshelp)